Yippie! Another boring cover! I do have to say this. Out of all the covers so far, this one feels like a comic book. I guess it has to do with the art style and the coloring, but this cover feels like it has the most action out of the three covers so I guess that is something.
The first panel introduces us to our famous fans for the week. And for once I do not have to know who these people are right away, since they tell us who they are in the panel. Hooray! Less work for me to do. First is Nastia Liukin, Russian-American gymnast and 2008 Olympic gold medal winner. Next up is Michael Phelps, a swimmer who has a total of 16 Olympic medals overall. Lastly there is Apolo Ohno, a speed ice skater who has 8 total medals. What all these people are doing in the same indoor pool area is beyond me. They could be friends, but Nastia is practicing on a balance beam next to the pool. Cause, yeah, that is totally safe. But the biggest question I got is why is Apolo there? He's a skater, and last time I checked, you can not skate on melted ice, or water as the kids call it. Anyway, the three of them stop whatever the heck they were doing because their subway sandwiches they ordered arrived. Ok, time out, everyone else had to get their own lunch and be late for whatever they were doing. That makes this group the smartest people on Subway-Earth so far. So as they eat their sandwiches, which DO have Avocado, Batman comes blasting through the wall. It might just be me, but I can't help think that Subway wanted to do a cross with the Kool-aid man but they had to use Justice Leaguers. Oh well, I still think Batman would say "OH YEAH!" in this universe if he could.
We now get to see our villains of this little romp, Mr Freeze and Solomon Grundy. Meh, I've seen weirder team ups. The two of them stand in the hole and Mr Freeze tells us his plan. Use Batman to call Green Lantern.
...
Why not just attack Coast City? You know, where Green Lantern is? I am fairly certain that would make more sense then attacking Batman in Gotham. Batman gets free from a Grundy hold by using his Bat aerosol deodorant. And now we get to the fourth panel and I get confused. How the heck did Batman and Grundy get into those poses from the last panel? Grundy was holding Batman with his left hand. Grundy tries to rub off the aerosol deodorant with his right, his left hand doing nothing. But for Batman to get to where he is from being held by Grundy's left, Grundy would have had to throw Batman like a ball and quickly pull his arm back to get into that pose. But even more then that, WHY did Grundy throw Batman at all? One would think the smart move would be to USE Batman to try and wipe the gas out of Grundy's eyes. And this is only page two people.
A green baseball glove is made and Batman is caught. Normally I complain about how Hal makes needlessly complex constructs, but I'll let this one slide since a baseball glove is most likely what I would do as well. Green Lantern says his ears were burning and asks if someone was calling for him. Why would that make your ears burn? Lantern and Batman talk about Grundy a bit. Now Panel five is where the stupid really starts. Mr. Freeze freezes the pool to stop Grundy from falling in and drowning. Grundy is a magical super zombie who came from a swamp. A SWAMP. If Grundy could drown, why did the swamp not kill him? But that is only the beginning of the stupid. Turns out, there is a young kid still swimming in the pool as Mr. Freeze freezes it. Sigh. I know that Earth-Subway has the dumbest humans ever, but really? A kid thinks that now, while super villains are attacking, is the best time to go for a swim. Of course, Green Lantern can't get the kid, no. Let's let our champ swimmer jump into the pool to save the worlds dumbest kid ever. And yes, I feel confidant about calling that kid really stupid.
So yeah, Michael gets to the kid and well, Michael just stops. Really, look at the panel. Michael is just floating there. He is not trying to lift the kid out or anything. He just stops. Apolo now gets into the fight as he just so happened to have enough time to put on his ice skates which he brought to a public pool. You know, like you all do every time you go to an indoor pool. I just thought of something. If this is a public pool, then why do they have a balance beam right next to the pool? Did Nastia bring it in from home? Ugh, never mind. Apolo skates circles around Grundy and that weakens the ice enough to make Grundy fall through. Fair enough, but I would have thought that with the ice gun, all the water would have been one huge block.
Green Lantern, using a fish scooper, gets our retarded kid and swimmer out of the water. Mr. Freeze, not a total idiot, sees this is the best time to try and kill Green Lantern. And it is here were I do have to say Earth-Subway did something right. Nastia back flip kicks Mr. Freeze, changing his aim and making him shoot Grundy. What many people seem to forget is that Barbra Gordan (AKA Batgirl) was a trained gymnast and an Olympic hopeful. Nastia here is in fact a gold medal winner in gymnastics. So if we can see Barbra Gordan doing all the moves she does, then I have no problem with Nastia getting in a free hit using her gymnast skills. Of course, Nastia does not that the nerves Barbra has, so in the next panel when Freeze points his gun at her, she locks up. Freeze does not get a shot as Batman and Green Lantern punch him with a BA-POW!
The last page has Batman thanking the three of them, who I'll admit did more help then the other fans in weeks past. Batman even comments that they have no powers. Nastia, not being a total bonehead, says that Batman has no power either. Batman, realizing that he is being thought less of, quickly changes the subject. Of course, the subject changes to where these fans got their energy. The answer is, now say it with me, Subway. And the comic ends with sitcom laughter.
Alright, I'll say it, this famous fans issue was not bad at all. It is still an ad comic taking place on Earth-Subway, but here it really felt more like a real comic story and not like a forced Subway ad. Our fans do real work this time and they know what they are doing. They do not try and get into the fight unless they need to and mostly they just help when no one else could get there. Yes, I know, if they weren't there in the first place, Batman and Green Lantern would still win, but that does not change the fact that these fans helped, really helped this time.
This issue of Famous Fans is a bit harder to find. I had my copy in issue 11 of DC Universe Online Legends.
Well next week is the last of the Famous Fans. Will it be as good as this week was or will it be dumber then issue 2? Next week, I'll let you know.
All images are owned by DC and Subway.
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