Sonic Kids Story 2

Last week we got the story of royal pain Sally, emo Tails, and lots of nothing happening. At the end of that story, it told us to turn the page to see how Tails got his shoes! Tails getting shoes?! That has to be the best story ever written by man or woman! Well I guess we'll have to see as we turn off our brains and eat chili dogs, its time for Sonic Kids Story 2.

Our story begins with Sonic babysitting a bunch of kids. They all have a ton of questions for him as little kids always do. Really there is nothing good or bad I can say about this page. Its just there to set up a start point for our story. I do want to comment on how the little, um, I'll say dog girl, asks where she can get shoes like Sonic. Well I am sure there is a TV somewhere you can break and get a pair of shoes. That is how I always found them in the games.

So Sonic explains that his shoes were made by his uncle and that his shoes are magic so Sonic gets out of explaining how they really work. He also said that his shoes are one of a kind, but the ones Tails wears are the closest around. After asking if they want to hear the story, the kids all shout an agreement. Wow. These kids are so board that they'll listen to how someone got a pair of shoes. So Sonic's tale begins with Tails getting all A's on his report card! So what? Does that mean that he gets shoes? Maybe, but at least the A's means that Tails get a shiny medal.. Look at panel 5 and tell me what expression Tails is suppose to have cause I got nothing. Also, Sally's colors are green now. I always thought she only ever wore blue. Oh well.

Antoine begins to tell the tale of how he got this medal. Wait a second, Sonic is telling a story about Antoine telling a story? Also, Sonic is not here so how did he know what was going on? I mean, sure, someone could have told Sonic about the events, but I like to think Sonic was sitting outside the house, listening in and laughing at all these guys. Anyway, while Boomer and Antoine are talking, mostly Antoine, Tails is telling Sally how upset he is that Sonic is not there. Tails, dude, please stop whining. Sally thinks to herself how she would get mad at Sonic is he does not show up. Of course, she thinks this right in front of Tails. Even without mind reading powers, that face Sally makes says 'Maybe he won't show up. I have no faith in him'. I am pretty sure Tails notices that face as well since he is still in frame.

And now, with no warning, we cut to Sonic. Sonic is taking part in an underground market trade. Archie Comics, just call it the Black Market next time. Sonic and the purple cloaks trade is a sack of rocks for a pair of shoes. Sonic does comment that this is a very dumb trade, but soon notices that he's late! Late for what? The all A's party? I dunno. As Sonic runs off, the man throws away the rocks and shows himself to be Tails's uncle! Yeah, I do not know why this is a big deal either. I just noticed something. Sonic got his shoes from his Uncle, Tails now from his Uncle. Is there a rule on this planet that you can only get shoes from your uncle? Is that why tons of animal-people go bare foot, cause their uncle, or lack of one, has not given them shoes? Oh and just to make it clear, in the last page Tails called Sally 'Aunt Sally'. Sally and Tails are not related, but Sally is like a big sister / mother to tails. This guy on this page, he is Tails's real uncle. A guy we'll never see again.

Once again, no warning scene change. This time we are looking at Dr. Robotnik himself. Thankfully, the name Eggman was not invented yet. After talking about how awesome his world is, Robotnik comments on how the Freedom Fighters are causing him trouble. Wait, that group that Sally made in the last story already is causing him more trouble them anything else? But the kids are still in school, learning basic math and English. How weak is your army if you can't stop them? Anyway, Shively, Robotnik's nephew (wonder if Shively got his shoes from Robotnik) asks how Robotnik is going to stop the Freedom Fighters.

Why with a time stopping laser of course.

...

What?! A time stopping laser?! Ok, I know this is a story that Sonic is telling little kids, but come on. Getting a pair of shoes does not need to be this action packed! Heck, I still think this whole story Sonic is making up as he goes. Anyway, Shively says he'll push the big yellow button but Robotnik says that Shively is not worthy. Ouch. When your evil dictator says you are not fit to be a mindless drone, that is pretty bad. Of course, Shively has his own evil ambitions, but it will be years before he does anything. So the chicken fires the Laser, missing Sonic by a few inches. Sonic wonders what it was but says he hopes it is not bad. Sonic, it's a laser firing at your village. OF COURSE IT'S BAD!!! Ugh, anyway, that's the end of part 1. Yeah, cause we needed this story to be broken up into parts in the same issue.

One page turn later, hey, look. Part 2 is starting now. As you might of guessed, the laser hit the forest and now everyone is stuck in time. Sonic just thinks that he is running so fast that everyone else only looks like they are frozen. Fair enough, super speed could make the world seem that way. But Sonic soon notices that they really are stuck when he stops moving. Rather then messing with people, like I know I would if time stopped, he runs back into the forest to try and get the people back before something happens. Why Sonic is still carrying around the shoes, I do not know.

Sure enough, SWAT Bots are already taking the furry animals to be turned into cold machines. As Robotnik does what all dictators do, only bark orders and not do anything himself, a single crabmeat bot asks Shively why Robotnik has to be like that. Shively says that it is because Robotnik is in charge, for now. So, backing up a bit, how does Knothole Village avoid detection from a guy with an army of robots with air crafts? Sure it could be dense forest, but from what I saw, Knothole is pretty much out in the open. Sonic notices that the robots are on their way to Knothole now, and how the village is doomed unless he does something.

Sonic tells the reader, yes the reader (Fourth wall, whats that?), that if he pretends to be frozen, the robots will take him away and he can find a way to reverse the effects of the laser. Normally I'd ask why would a villain have a reverse function on his laser but I have to remember that this is a Sonic comic. Also, while you are trying to reverse the effects, those robots you commented on are still getting closer to the village. Even if you turn time back on, the robots will still be there. Anyway, Shively finds Sonic and gloats how Robotnik will be pleased to see Sonic among the frozen. And part 2 ends with Sonic, on the air ship, being taken away. 9 pages, and 2 parts done.

Part 3 begins with Robotnik talking to himself about how awesome he is and how he'll take over the galaxy and there is no way anyone will ever stop him and blah blah blah evil monologue. Serious question, if Sonic is such a pain, why not just turn him into a robot now and get it over with? You were going to do that anyway. Putting Sonic under spot lights just seems like a dumb move on your part.

And a dumb move is proven when Sonic just gets up and starts moving. You ever notices that Robotnik's secretary kinda sucks? Sonic, after pulling on Robotnik's mustache, proceeds to push all the buttons on Robotnik's control panel, hoping to find the one that will reverse the laser. In doing so, Sonic launched 4 nukes, turned at least 70 furry creatures into evil robots, and started a program called Barney the Dinosaur. Okay, that stuff didn't happen, but it could have!

Turns off Sonic did find the big yellow button as a second blast from the time stopping laser makes people frozen move and people unfrozen stop. Well isn't that just the most convenient thing ever. The animals run away while Shively and the robots become stuck in place.

Sonic runs circles around Robotnik and the SWAT bots, who came out of no where, shoot the time stopping machine. Doing this makes all the effects of the machine end. Robotnik yells to get that hedgehog, but Sonic is already back in the forest. Well that was quick. Making puns, Sonic goes back to Knothole Village.

Sally, now unfrozen, is trying to cheer up Tails. She says Sonic is normally on time. But when Sonic comes into the village on the next panel, Tails is happy and Sally does all she can to make Sonic feel bad. Seriously Sally, lighten up a bit will ya? Sonic tells Tails to close his eyes while Sonic uses this time to go get those shoes.

And rather then show Sonic avoiding SWAT bots who are still most likely in the area recovering from being frozen in time, Sonic just comes back with the shoes. Tails thinks the shoes are the coolest thing, but I think Sonic could have given Tails a rock and we would have gotten the same expression. While Tails is showing off his new shoes to his friends, Sally pulls Sonic aside and is mad at Sonic. Again, Sally, lighten up. Sonic replies to mad Sally with a bad pun. Sonic, puns only made Sally angrier.

So our comic ends with Sonic noticing he put all the kids asleep with his story. Ya know, writers, it is not a good sign when you show the end result of the story you are trying to tell is it was so boring people fell asleep while listening.

And that was Sonic Kids story 2. I don't think this story really happened, but that Sonic was making the whole thing up as he went. I mean, for Sonic to know this whole story he would had to be at all the parts. That would mean that he was outside the hut where his friends were and inside Robotnik's base before Robotnik fired his laser. Not to mention, Sonic got the colors wrong on Sally. He said this was a story on how Tails got his shoes but really that was a subplot for the story about the time stopping laser. The shoes played no part in anything. Now if the shoes were key in stopping the laser, that would have been something. Art wise, I can not get over some of the expressions the characters have. From Tails on page 2 panel 4, all the way at the end, panel 2 Sonic. Still, this was a fun little trip back into the past for me.

In Sonic Kids, there is another story, but it has nothing to do with the kids at all. The last story is about Sonic, Sally, and Antoine telling how they beat up a robot while the other 2 did nothing but it turns out all three of them worked together to take down the machine. Since it has nothing to do with Sonic Kids, I plan on skipping that one. But come back next week none the less when I take a look at another comic I enjoy that is bad.

All images are owned by Archie Comics.